We Are All Normal

Posted by Cheryl Sloane on

One of the most important and fulfilling things I do as a Sexual Happiness Coach is to let women know that whatever is going on in their sex lives, they are not alone. There is no normal. Women's sexual response is complicated and varied.

  • What turns us on?
  • Do we initiate or respond?
  • How often do we think about sex?
  • What's our favorite way to orgasm? 

We have been socialized to not talk about our sexual desires or performance. This is all changing. The more women come together and talk about these questions, the more we realize that we are not alone. We are entitled to pleasure and happiness at all stages of life. Change is normal and redefining what satisfaction means will enhance our lives as long as we do so with love and an open heart.

After years of studying male sexual response and assuming it's sort of the same for women, scientists and researchers are finally studying women's sexual response. Turns out we can't just assume that because men spontaneously experience the desire for sex, women do too.....duh! Also turns out that a women's emotional and genital experience doesn't always match. Like a man gets erect and is in love 😉....we don't necessarily have the same reaction. 

We have a sexual accelerator & a sexual brake in our brains. They differ for each of us and they are responsible for how we react to sexual stimuli. As Dr. Emily Nagoski says in her book Come As You Are, "We're all made up of the same parts, but in each of us, those parts are organized in a unique way that changes over our lifespan." Yes, you are normal.

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